Not Chuck Norris Jokes ~ Regular One Line Zingers
I'm not a fan of daylight Savings Time, Because every time I go to my daylight savings time account... It's over drawn. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ I finally started eating healthier. Now I feel worse emotionally AND physically. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ My attention span is so bad I started this coffee yesterday. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ I tried being productive today but my Wi-Fi sensed motivation and immediately went down. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Every cooking recipe I've tried starts with “simple and easy to make, with ingredients you already have ” then suddenly I need saffron and eye of newt, harvested under a full moon. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ My bank account and my ambitions are no longer on speaking terms. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ I bought a planner to organize my life. Now I’m behind schedule in writing. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Adulthood is just googling weird symptoms until you accidentally learn tax law. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ I exercise regularly. Mostly my right thumb scrolling. ~~...
