A married Irishman went into the confessional and said to
'I almost had an affair with another woman.'
The priest said, 'What do you mean, almost?'
The Irishman said, 'Well, we got undressed and rubbed
together, but then stopped.'
The priest said, 'Rubbing is the same as putting it in.
You're not to see that woman again. For your penance, say five Hail
Mary's and put £50 in the poor box.'
The Irishman left the confessional, said his prayers and
then walked over to the poor box. He paused for a moment and then
started to leave.
The priest, who was watching, quickly ran over to him
saying, 'I saw that. You didn't put any money in the poor box!'
The Irishman replied, 'Yeah, but I rubbed the £50 on
the box and according to you, that's the same as putting it